the weekend

okay. This weekend I met John. here's what happened.

Victory, the girlfriend I was staying with, decided it would be fun to publicly humiliate me by having John show up in one of the stores we were shopping in (because we were hanging out in the downtown area). I had a feeling she was going to bring me into a store with him waiting, or tell him where I was, or send me to go get something so I'd run into him. I was correct.

I was trying on dresses and I heard her talking on the phone with someone. she said something along the lines of "okay we'll meet and have lunch… see you in a few." I knew right away she was talking to him, telling him to come to the store we were in.

he came into the shop while I was still changing. I came out of the dressing room and our eyes met instantly. I recognized him, even though I'd never truly seen him before, because he looked right, he looked like what I thought he'd look like. maybe I'm a freak or maybe I'm clairvoyant, but I can see people in my head when I hear their voices. I can do it with singers too.

anyway. he said something about a picture of me not being adequate, everyone went "awwww" simultaneously and apparently I blushed (that wasn't embarrassing or anything…). I found out he has Number 26 down pat. we took him to lunch, and we spent the rest of the day hanging out together. then he came back with us to Victory's house. we played a retarded card game that made me want to murder Victory (don't ask me to play Mau ever again) and ate ice cream.

that evening, I was exhausted and overwhelmed. there were a lot of people, John was a lot sexier than I expected him to be (seriously? chemistry makes this even more complicated.) and there was a lot of noise. overwhelmed doesn't begin to describe it.

so I sat in the dark front room (in public, but it was a little more private than the kitchen table) and waited for him to come to me, because I knew he would, because he sees me. not like other guys who I'd have to text and say "can we hang out?" or "I need to talk to you" or "I need to be by myself for a while, I'll be right back" or "we haven't gotten a second to ourselves for the whole day and we have things to talk about. get over here." no, John sees me, he's very aware of me, he can read me and understand what's going on inside my head better than I do sometimes. so I went to the living room and waited for him to come.

he did. he sat with me, forced me to look him in the eye and talk to him (which I have a lot of trouble with, but he was patient) and then he asked my mom if he could take me on a walk.

at 9:00 at night.

I was thinking, 'mom is going to say yes. dad would say no, but mom would say yes.' she did say yes, so we went. he told her we'd be gone for thirty minutes.

we got back an hour and a half later.

no I'm not telling you what we did or said. I will say it was all appropriate and the second he got a little too close for my comfort I gave him a glare and a warning and he assured me he would honor me. He did. he did hug me though. that was nice.

we seem to lose track of time. we've talked on the phone for four hours before. once I was up until 3am on the phone. seriously, this just isn't making sense! and yet it seems to be a little too good to be true.

and that usually means it is.

anyway, we went to church together this morning, and we went to Starbucks after. We talked a lot, but then this jerk sat down right next to us and we could tell he was listening to us, so we left.

anyway. it was really nice. he's coming to my hometown soon and I'll meet his parents.

seriously can't wait to see him again.

and that, dear readers, is all the detail you'll get. for now.

maybe in the future if things turn out well, I'll type up one of my real diary entries…

distant future. like, five years from now. or fifteen.

he did make me a promise, though. one I feel like I can share. he told me he wouldn't kiss me until our wedding day. that means a lot to me. that was something I almost put on the list, but told myself that I could compromise on that if it were someone really amazing.

who would have thought I'd have found amazing and willing to wait for me? how special is that??

I let him borrow a few books from me: an encyclopedia of serial killers (he's a Criminology major and has morbid curiosities about violent people like I do) and Sonnets of the Portuguese by Elizabeth Barrett Browning (which, if you haven't read that, you must. she's amazing and so romantic…). the fact that he borrowed love poems from me—and I had him pick from a stack of books, and he chose the sappy poems—makes me happy.

I'm going to try to get some sleep tonight. we'll see if it works.