Nov 25, 2011

warning: long dramatic rambling post about emotions and christmas and boyfriends

Thus far Thanksgiving has been pretty good. see the thing about breaks is… I love my family, but I don't like living with them. this has very little to do with them and most to do with the fact that it puts all six (or more) of us in a very small house and I just get overwhelmed. I have nowhere to be alone and recharge. Even now im sitting "alone" and I'm not really "alone." and I've found that if I don't have enough alone time I explode.

meaning school is stressful, and home is stressful. I feel like I have nowhere to go to actually have a break.

I can't wait for Christmas… but man am I dreading living at home for that long.

on the bright side, John is with us for the whole break, so I get to see him a lot. I'm so happy. I really am. it's been wonderful. I can hug him WHENEVER I WANT TO! that means a lot. I don't have to text him all day and tell him how much I miss him. because I don't. it's weird to NOT miss him.

I went to the doctor today. she gave me a prescription for birth control to help my periods stay regular, and some anxiety medication that I don't remember what it's called. John came with me. he sat in the waiting room tho, he didn't come in with me.

so then we went around town and chilled a little, which was nice, and got coffee, which was great, and sat together and talked and laughed for a while.

we decorated the tree tonight too. that was fun. except mom has a new puppy, a blue standard poodle (he's not really blue, he's grey, but they call them blue) and we're afraid that he'll break the nice ornaments, so we only put up about two thirds of them this year.

I miss school, but I don't want this break to end because I don't want to drop him back off and drive another five hours back to school.

on the bright side, I'll see him a lot over Christmas break, and that's only a few weeks away. so it won't be another month or six week fast from seeing him…

sigh.

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